It couldn't be because I'm black, right?

Saturday night my wife and I had a nice dinner at the blu restaurant at Belmont, and then go to check out a friend's wedding reception after party at The Deep night club. As we get there we see a couple of people that we recognised and got to make some small talk with them. We're about to step inside when this staff member walks up to us and asks us "Can I help you?". Instinctively I explain that we're about to go to the night club then the guy immediately brushes us aside to I assume have a chat of some kind with the guys responsible for giving out the wristbands. But as we turn around we realize that the staff member did not ask anybody else if they needed help. We also noticed that we were the only black people in the vicinity.

Now, I'm no icon of fashion, but I'm sure I wasn't dressed like a hoodlum or someone potentially dangerous. We didn't look like we were lost, in fact we had just finished talking to the groom (by the way the groom looked sharp and the bride absolutely stunning).

To the two of us, the conclusion was clear. And we were completely disgusted by it. Unfortunately I didn't get the guy's name (my wife may have), but we weren't in much mood to party afterwards and left fairly quickly after that. Way to ruin a good night with what seemed to be an assumption that because we were black that we could not have any reason to be hanging out at this reception.

I'm sickened even now thinking about those events. Screw them.


Anonymous said...

Let me know when you get an apology, because I'm not going to be eating at any MEF places until you do.


Anonymous said...

It really is terrible that in 2009 something like that would happen to anyone in this country.. Sadly it is a reality for many and goes to show how much farther we have to go.

If you can get that guys name talk to management, if they are in anyway serious about a Bermuda free of racism (as all Bermudians should) then he may find himself without a job.

Letariatpro said...

Man that sucks! WTF, I would have wifey have a chat with the bride's father(not the bride, it would suck to cast this over her wedding night), and let him know, with as good a description of the the offender she can.

Renaissance Man said...


That's amazingly ignorant in this day and age. Mind you, there seems to be an inordinate amount of preoccupation with melanin on both sides.

I hope you can get a resolution, because this sort of behaviour shouldn't be tolerated.

Andrew said...

Are you being too sensitive? Did you look lost/confused? Are there any other reasons why he may have asked, "Can I help you?"

Tryangle said...

Like I said in the original post, we had just finished talking with the groom. So I don't think being confused was an issue.

The fact is that the person walked past a number of other people to speak with us.

Andrew, I wish I did immediately ask him why he thought that we, instead of others, needed to be questioned. I don't think I want to come across as crying out racism or accusatory, it's just that our impressions of events led to one strongly possible factor.

As far as being sensitive is concerned, I don't know if I want to engage along that line of discussion. Some may find that question condescending. That if a black person thinks someone acted a certain way because of his race, he's 'too sensitive' and not possibly worthy of consideration.

I went through several possibilities. I don't have another person's point of view to see if the staffer saw something different (such as us newly arrived on the scene). What I know is that for the period that we were outside the staffer did not ask anybody else the same question.

The fact that I'm writing such a lengthy response probably makes me appear as defensive as being speculated. Go figure, I feel offended and I'm the one who's now feeling like I have to justify my opinions. Just can't win...