2005-02-18

Whappenings from England

I kind of consider myself fortunate not to have had any Internet access during my brief vacation in England, I was able to rest my eyes somewhat. Overall it wasn't a bad time away, it was good to get away from the grind for a while although I may still kick myself for travelling on the actual date of the Superbowl. Brief notes below:

Sunday/Monday (flight)
  • Departure lounge. They're showing the Superbowl on the TV monitors. Cool. Just when an exciting play happens (did McNabb fumble?) early in the quarter, I have to board. Crap. I just know I won't be able to watch the game as I'll know the result within hours of landing.
  • I love the GPS system on board these 777s. Oddly enough, we're approaching London and the weather forecast is "sunny". Now first of all, it's dark, so, like, um, nope... and then the captain mentions fog. Yippee.
  • It's cold but the fog does lift by the time I reach my aunt's house. But I'm soon asleep though and probably miss a decent day. Heh.
Tuesday
  • In North America, there's this somewhat weird commercial featuring Digger the Dermatophite who digs underneath your nails and infects them and then some big tablet comes in, knocks him away and saves the day. England features the same guy, but with a Brit accent and calls himself Freddy the Fungus. I crack up. No tablet comes along in this version though, which is a bit disappointing.
  • Travel by tube and then National Rail into the central city. Pretty neat system, the London Underground, and not much has changed from my brief forays here 20 months ago. I like maps so enjoy the experience.
  • Pass by Wembley on the tube. They're building the new stadium and boy it looks like it's going to be big. Really big. Biggest venue I've been in is Kensington Oval and that had a capacity of like 14 thousand. This thing I think will eventually seat 80 thousand. Wow.
  • Uh oh. All the sports talk is about Ellen MacArthur. On the plus side, I'm not getting spoiled with Superbowl news. But the fascination with this lady here is incredible. I do appreciate the skill and endurance needed to sail a boat 10 miles, much less all the way around the globe, but the achievement itself, well, I dunno. It's like that Branson fella spending all that dough and making all that noise about flying across the world in a balloon. Credit to her, definitely, but the annointment of her as sporting achievement of the year is to me a bit too much. The bad news of this is that someone in the US, is eventually going to butt up on this story and then decide for themselves to break her record. And we'll never hear the end of it.
Wednesday
  • It's amazing the differences in what you can say or show on TV between the US and UK. In the UK, you can say s*** (after like 10pm), but you can never use the term "wanker". Odd.
  • I take back all that I have ever said about nationalism on TV news. ABC/NBC/CBS are forgiven for being Americentric. BBC News is all about the UK. So all sides are forgiven.
  • Superbowl news: nada. Wow, but I'm not flinching yet.
  • The other big thing about TV in the UK is that the biggest shows are the soap operas. And they appear during prime time. I may die if I have to live here for more than a month, heh.
  • England has their own Oprah. This woman, named Trisha, is seemingly a younger, slimmer version of the US giant but a bit more sassy and ready to butt in. I could like her. And yes, from the above list, you can clearly tell that this was a sit at home and watch the TV kind of day.
Thursday
  • We rent. They "Let". Makes sense once you get past the kindergartney aspect of that phrase. It's very "matter of fact". I can appreciate that.
  • Bus ride. English schoolkids are just as rowdy as their Bermudian or Bajan equivalents. Darn. Was hoping they'd be more like the chaps from the Famous Five or something.
  • I hate shopping. And nothing brings tears of misery to my eyes more than shopping for women's shoes.
  • The Masters is taking place at Wembley, I gather from a billboard next to the arena there. It's Snooker, people. Why the devil are snooker and darts so popular in this country? It's odd to see these pasttimes considered mainstream major sports. But they're going to televise some games later on in the week so maybe I'll figure it all out before I head out.
  • Any Bermudian wishing to drive if visiting the UK, please take a new driving test. Brits are so much better at the rules of the road - and this includes dealing with a larger host of signs and laws that I wager would frustrate the average Bermie lunatic, um, I mean, driver.
  • Virginia's put up a law banning exposed underwear on people wearing those pants halfway down their hips? Wow. And way to go, I think.
Friday
  • Uh oh. Charles and Camilla. They announced their wedding plans the other day and it's still the big talking point in this country. Whatever. North Korea admitted that they have nukes and apparently aren't shy about launching if need be. Priorities, news media? Anyway people are more concerned if Charles should still be in line for the crown, and the silly bit is that the crown has no real power attached to it. I mean, the Queen can't order troops to mobilize somewhere, for instance, so like whatever to this whole saga. Crap. I've become a Republican.
  • Brits love their breakfasts. Eat bacon and eggs at 2:30 pm and all. Now I understand why Frodo and those hobbits could eat elevenses and whatnot.
  • I love my aunt, but boy. I've been bought an avocado and spinach sandwich for lunch. Hello? I'm a carnivore! I have canines! Heheh.
  • Kelly Osbourne is on this late night variety show. The host wants her to help break the record for most swear words uttered on a TV programme. Really. And they cuss like drunken sailors. Heh, and wow. And boy Kelly's cleavage... what the heck am I thinking?
Saturday
  • Travelling day today. One thing I noticed, is that there's a fair-sized Indian population here. And the women, they're all so pretty. And slim. Perhaps too slim. Odd. But still pretty. Okay that's my bit of obsessive gazing for the week.
  • Proof that No good deed goes unpunished. Was waiting outside this fast food place, an old man with a terrible cough goes inside, wants a cup of tea. It's 50p. I say, why not, I buy it for the guy. He drinks and leaves soon afterwards. I stay inside as it's warmer there. The guy working there kicks me out saying that I haven't bought anything so I have to go. Mind you, he's not exactly pulling in customers or anything, but I remind him that I did buy something for the old guy. He doesn't see my point at all. I feel like peeing on the front door of the place.
Sunday
  • Oooooo. First but of McDonald's. Mmmmm. Greeeeease...
  • What the hell is a Pukka Pie? The name alone scares me from even considering eating it. And the TV commercial showing it expanding as it's baking.... ugh. I don't wanna know.
  • Freddy the Fungus again! Bwah!
  • Bingo Hall. It's massive. They even have a version of the game that's placed across the city. A bit disturbing, maybe. Perhaps that's the compromise that Bermuda will accept for gambling, although there's not a demand from tourists to play bingo instead of roulette. Heh.
Monday
  • I think I can be a Tube Maestro in no time if I stick around. Now buses... that's another matter entirely.
  • Got a haircut. I think the guy was nervous. He was lightning quick getting the hair off but wasn't too sure of himself when trimming and shaping. Turns out I had a few small nicks in the end, I realized it after the fact.
Tuesday
  • Weakest Link. The Brits are much more polite with each other than their American counterparts. When voting someone off, they actually admit things like how they thought that they themselves messed up a lot. Nice to see Anne Robinson again.
  • Simpsons? Yay!
  • TV snooker. I think I can get the gist of it. Scoring system I think I understand as well. However, there's no way that this can replace athletic sports just yet for TV viewing.
Wednesday
  • The West End. Bond Street. Oxford Circus. Shopping Mecca, I think. Hey there's an electronics store! Rats. Apple Store, and if I cared at all about iPods or owned a Mac, I'd be interested.
  • Went into Cheers. Yep, they made a pub in London based on the TV show. Go into the restroom. Hm, they've pasted up front pages of the USA Today sports section... Noooooo! Photo of Tom Brady! Noooooo!
  • Cancel my request for a tape of the game. It's never fun when you already know the result. Sigh.
Thursday
  • Mother's Day on March 6th? Huh? I hope that's a typo on the billboard, I'll have to follow up on that. There's something inherently wrong about celebrating your mother during the winter. It deserves to be in the springtime.
  • Flight home. Person behind me keeps kicking my chair. I think she's overweight and can't adjust herself in the seats properly so feel a bit sympathetic. Doze off during the movie Sideways and wake up just in time to see the naked man (seriously! Things be bouncing!) bouncing along chasing down the other guy. I do not need to wake up with that image coming after me, thanks.
  • Home. Strained my back picking up my bag up. Not a good way to end it all. And that is it.

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